tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21050713.post7253014521939819573..comments2023-10-31T11:30:53.528-04:00Comments on Master of Irony: Here I amJust Mehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01085642883987294862noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21050713.post-88672854842735128612007-07-16T22:11:00.000-04:002007-07-16T22:11:00.000-04:00Emilijia-You give me a lot of hopoe for my future....Emilijia-<BR/>You give me a lot of hopoe for my future. My psychiatrist keeps reminding me that either I'll respond to one of my remaining meds or ECT (which we still don't know whether I'm a candidate for; it is my preferred next choice I think) or I won't. If I won't we'll keep me as good as I can be until something comes along that works. You're proof that can happen. <BR/><BR/>Per my general pattern it probably won't be terribly long before I'm in an unstable place again. It'd be a huge deal for me to make it past SAD season starting without a change that we won't be able to handle with the depakote changes we've been so lucky to have had me tolerate lately. I'm actually doing well at the moment and hopefully that lasts, but I'm in the stage of the illness where each good day is a gift and none are counted on.<BR/><BR/>There is another drug (not Invega which I'm automatically considered allergic to since it's a derivative of Risperdal) coming out sometime soon that I pray is my saving grace...Just Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01085642883987294862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21050713.post-55822517082742649182007-07-16T21:51:00.000-04:002007-07-16T21:51:00.000-04:00I also couldn't take geodon and risperidol because...I also couldn't take geodon and risperidol because of extrapyramidal side effects. Seroquel and Abilify are not strong enough for me, evidently. I've been quite manic and paranoid even on high doses of both. Zyprexa did it for me, although it has been quite a sacrifice. For one entire month, I was a zombie, and didn't know if I would ever come out of it. I finally did come out of the fog. I gained huge amounts of weight. I think that back then they didn't know how bad it was for weight gain. Maybe I would have worked harder to fight it. Certainly I might not have blamed and hated myself so much while I was gaining the weight. I actually tried going to OA, telling myself that I had become a compulsive overeater. But it has been worth it, I finally have a life again. Zyprexa keeps me stable enough to tolerate the high doses of antidepressants I need without getting manic, and that has made life worth living again. Don't give up! I had so many years on so many meds, in and out of hospitals. All I hoped was that life would become bearable. I never even dared to hope for happiness. But in fact, I am happy these days more than I could ever imagine.Jean Greyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13826037279061710386noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21050713.post-2144812227907567922007-07-15T12:59:00.000-04:002007-07-15T12:59:00.000-04:00Well, a long time on disability is probably coming...Well, a long time on disability is probably coming my way. I have chosen to continue to work and try med adjustments many times, but certain meds have meant time off. I have managed to arrange that without really taking time off; either starting during vacation, trading days to make long weekends, or whatever, but certain meds, mainly antipsychotics, are too much to start.<BR/><BR/>The problem I face still is that I have not yet been on an antipsychotic that didn't have dangerous side effects, or ones that were intolerable and not treatable. When I developed extrapyramidal effects on Geodon I didn't just get things treatable with Cogentin, I also had incontinence. Auto-stop. Risperdal gave me hypertension. Unfortunately it was not a little, it was dangerously high (200/1something) and I had 3+ edema. I wound up on meds for that for a year even after I stopped it because months of manipulation did not make it go down from the high moderate range of hypertension.<BR/><BR/>And then there are the actual allergies.....<BR/><BR/>Oh, and slow dosing....we've actually done that, with the general understanding I have to be patient about results. We've created doses for me. Sometimes this helps, sometimes not. The best example of failure though was abilify. The doctor told me she was afraid I might have some problems with it (I think she was afraid of it triggering mania). So I started on 1/8 of the usual starter dose or something like that. Within a couple days I couldn't focus my eyes and had akathesia. Actually she gave me Risperdal with microdosing, which was how I wound up being very lucky with my blood pressure skyrocketing.<BR/><BR/>I just hope the time off concept works for me this time...<BR/><BR/>I think the only med I've stopped because I couldn't adjust to it and work was trileptal. <BR/><BR/>But planning for extended time off means that I'll have time to try antipsychotics and be sedated. I'llJust Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01085642883987294862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21050713.post-3513041021390664512007-07-15T01:04:00.000-04:002007-07-15T01:04:00.000-04:00I think that when a person is not stable on meds, ...I think that when a person is not stable on meds, it is hard to "make progress" in therapy, at least in the ways that therapists want us to. That doesn't mean we can't make use of therapy, or that there aren't certain ways in which we can grow or learn. But things are going to be hard until the meds get straightened out, no matter how good the therapist. <BR/><BR/>As far as the meds go, I too have had every side effect under the sun. But I had one luxory that you don't have. I had the luxory of time. I went on disability for a number of years, and if it took my 6 months to titrate up on a med or stop passing out from orthostatic hypotension, I had that time. Now that I am working again, I am much more limited in what I can do with my meds when things need adjusting. If the intial sedation doesn't clear up over a long weekend, I can't go on it. As for blood pressure, my high dose Effexor gives me hypertension. But it is easier to take blood pressure meds than to find another anti-depressant that works.Jean Greyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13826037279061710386noreply@blogger.com