Monday, October 08, 2012
Thank you
I really, really appreciate those who have posted. In fact I'm trying to do something I've grown bad at and responding to your comments. I used to do that more and then this last year I quit because I kept signing in with my real name and I was afraid that sometime I wouldn't catch it in time. I can monitor well enough to do that now. However, please remember that my hormones are insane just now (I have my ovaries but they shut down for a while after the surgery) and so if I get emotional in a response or can't say something clearly I'm probably fighting weird mood swings and possibly a hot flash or two (they are so gross!). And sometimes I'll still on pain meds to boot.
Right now I feel like "Oh, there are people out there, of course I'll keep blogging". And probably I will. I just need to think some things through.
I very much would appreciate further feedback from anyone. Perhaps I should have just said that I'm considering stopping because I don't want to be the trainwreck blog and I'd like to know why people read or if there is a benefit (even entertainment that isn't morbid) to this. And honestly maybe what I need to do is just plan that I'll ask that at distant intervals.
Once upon a time I was involved in the bipolar community. Then my closest friend in that community quit blogging and eventually had a tragedy in the family (involving bipolar) that made me run. So perhaps I also need to re-enter there. I haven't yet because I'm not comfortable yet with my completely changed world and my role there would be very different.
Anyway, please keep posting and I'm filing this all away to think about when I can do small things like sit up for long period of time (that is limiting blogging a good bit right now). Everything swells when I'm sitting up for long. And that is not a good feeling.
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2 comments:
Hi Jen,
Gosh, I’ve not read here for a couple of days and see now that you have a lot on your mind! I totally “get” what you are saying about your blog, and your intentions and feelings regarding it.
As far as continuing to blog… if it’s what you want to do, if it is fulfilling and helpful to you, then do it. If it is not, then stop. “Trust your instincts and do what makes you happy”, is my advice.
I do think your writings here for the past many years are inspirational, and that they would certainly help someone who is going through the same types of struggles. Truly, you have helped me; the way you have overcome your challenges, the manner in which you control your illness, your positive attitude, your ability to plow through the hard (very hard!) stuff… it’s all here on these pages. And, your rainbow… always looking to Him and trusting. It’s your beautiful testament.
I hope you don’t believe, because you are no longer working, that any part of this blog has lost validity! Please don’t believe that! I have always thought there is something more for you to “do” and accomplish – hard to see that while you’re lying around recovering with too much time to think. But I truly do not believe that God is done with you – there is a purpose and a future to look forward to, and we just don’t know what it is yet. Perhaps these ideas you have regarding a different kind of blog, or reconnecting with the bi-polar community is part of it (?)
Why do I read? Lots of reasons! I genuinely like you, admire you, appreciate your thoughts, your drive, your faith, and your tenacity. I consider you a friend – as weird as that may sound. I keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I cheer for your triumphs (my FAVORITE is how the Anne situation worked out so beautifully!-I love, love, love that!) and I hurt with you in the times your struggle has been most overwhelming. I consider you a “sister in Christ” and I care about you. I think you are a very special young woman.
And now I’ve written a book. Ha! And yeah, I could go on and on some more but will stop here and believe you get the gist of why I am here and continue to read.
As always, I ask for God’s guidance and Blessings regarding these decisions you will make. I have seen His Hand a lot in your life, and believe He will guide you to your answer.
Love from, Becky
Glad to hear this just from a selfish perspective. If it gets too much, just do as I did, I pretty well shut off last year. Just too much of too much!!!
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