Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Thursday, February 26, 2015

A challenge I don't want

I don't want to be specific because I don't ever, ever want him to somehow find this and recognize himself and be hurt, but I'm having issues with Dr. Mind.  Issues big enough that I have to confront him.  And I'm scared to do it.  I don't want to hurt him but some things need to change.  I know that there is fault on both sides but he isn't bringing it up so I have to.  And I don't want to at all.

The thing is that we have a big problem right now.  It really is something that has to change.  But it is really hard to criticize this man who has been so kind and generous to me for 8 years.  It's also hard because I know he's having health issues still.  And in some ways I am afraid that these issues are worse things than they've yet diagnosed.  Because that kind of thing is the only explanation I can come up for that explains the drastic changes in him.

I don't know.  I know that I care about and respect this man a lot and I really don't want to hurt him in any way.  Not many people have gone out of their way to help me as he has.

It just is not good.  I am dreading Monday.  I think I will do this then although I may chicken out and give it another week.  I'm not sure yet.  But I really don't want to do it at all.

I just hope I can do it right.

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Jean Grey said...

I don't know what is going on- but maybe you need a change? Sometimes I think that if I see a therapist too long it stops being helpful- like I have learned what I can from this person and I need to move on. But I also know that is not easy- I am thinking about it right now, but I'm not sure I'm up to starting with someone new right now.

Michal McAllister said...

Wow. Just...wow...

You need clarity and courage...and I think you have those qualities and strengths.

You can get this conversation started. I know it.


Just Me Jen said...

The only thing I know is that I don't want to change therapists and am committed to making this work. Dr. Mind and I have disagreed from time to time but overall he is the person I need to treat me; his skills are exactly what I need. I also feel pretty sure that if I was supposed to move on that he would have taken one of the other job opportunities. He didn't and because I know how I felt about that possibility I know how I feel about terminating with him now. I'm fairly sure I'll see him until he retires. We just have to get through a rough discussion and hopefully things will be good again.

Rachael said...

I only read this today - so your Monday is over - but I hope it went well. I'm thinking of you and him and hoping you can find mutual resolution.