Wow

I am still quite sick but I did get antibiotics and the sole prescription decongestant I can take, and my fever FINALLY broke, so as soon as my throat isn't sore, I can talk in more than a croak, and I am not coughing like I have endstage emphysema I'll be good again.

The good thing is that I spent an hour croaking at the psychologist and it seems I actually am out of this summer's major episode. I'm still dealing with a lot, obviously, and will be for a while, but confirmation of what I've sort of suspected but have been too afraid to really question is good. I'm afraid that the transition will be too much, but so far so good really. I've had mood fluctuations, we've changed meds and although one change had to be stopped thanks to this stupid cold and my inability to know how I felt, it was a change I'd rather not make anyway and I'm hoping I'll find out some psych symptoms last week were really the beginning of being physically sick (something I'm not good at admitting is happening. For example, my throat is very, very sore yet I've been trying to pass that off as "a little" until the doctor informed me otherwise. Or Friday I started feeling dizzy at times, which has continued through today. Never thought the doctor might want to know that.....).

The next step is making the change reality. I helped out at one of my new places Friday; that made it somewhat more real although not as much as I wish because part of being a contract therapist is occasionally helping out in facilities you've never been to so it didn't feel totally real that this is MY place, MY desk, etc. Tomorrow I guess I am to start bringing my own things home. That I dread more than I want to think about, which I'm sure is why the psychologist says to do it now.

Two and one-half weeks.....