Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Rock. Hard Place.

I'm depressed. I've know this was happening, but I'm feeling worse every day. I only want to sleep. I cry frequently. I'm frustrated with everything. I miss my cat.

I got labs today to see if my med levels are to blame. Hopefully that's all it is.

I think I need more antidepressant, but my doctor isn't going to want me to increase. I've never handled more than I'm taking now without getting manic, and she thinks a side effect of it is why I keep getting UTIs. So I don't know what happens, because I also cannot tolerate any more of my mood stabilizers. I'm struggling with making it to work now because it is so far. I think my days of driving so far are going to self-limit. That's the first time I've admitted that, but I think it's true. Great. 3 jobs in a year. There's a great resume....

3 comments:

thethirddegree said...

I'm praying for you. <3

Emilija said...

3 jobs in a year- that says a lot about you. That you are tough. It says you are a fighter. It says that you won't give up. I'm thinking of leaving my job of 5 years and you'd think the world is going to end! (Really, the OT license application for NJ is so bad, I think they want to keep people out. No other state is that bad.) I think you have a remarkably resiliant streak in you.

otgirl said...

I'm sorry you're struggling. :(