Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Crawling into a hole

I'm defintely having an allergic reaction, probably to Lamictal. I'm off it until further notice. I may get to try again with an even slower start. For now I have to take very sedating meds, skip work AGAIN, and not take the med that finally get me stabilized for the first time in forever. If the reaction isn't controlled with the med I got tonight I have to take steroids, which will make me manic. The reaction has to go away from my eye soon.

I'm angry at the universe. i'm supposed to not focus on what-ifs, but this isn't even a what-if, this just stinks.

So I'm going to do my thing for a while. I will probably sleep most of the next few days; if I don't then we'll see how I feel about writing.


Anonymous said...

I stumbled upon your blog looking up info about quitting meds. Don't know why, I've done it before -successfully- (for a few years anyway. We have much in common in the sense that I too am in the helping professions and have bipolar (I refuse to say I'm bipolar, because I'm not, I'm Lesa!).

I was diagnosed in 1995 and have dealt with all the meds you have and then some, with many of the same problems. From what I've read, you rapid cycle. I suffer mixed states, which suck and can be very dangerous (in that when depressed have plenty of energy, restlessness, irritability, and impulsiveness along with "I give" depression -said more for your readers than you, as I'm sure you are aware of this type).

Point is, the most successful cocktail I have used is Celexa 80mg, Lamictal 200mg (considered max dose), and Seroquel 50mg (maint. dose) to 300 or mg (active cycle). This cocktail makes sense in that the Celexa is effective in controlling depression, the Lamictal works well in stabilizing mood (though NOT preventing mania/hypomania), and the Seroquel is effective in treating both the mania AND depression.

I have read that you have had experiences with all these meds with exception to the Seroquel.

I was curious why Seroquel hasn't been suggested for you? I would highly recommend you discussing this with your doctor. I also find it highly unusual that you are being treated with ANY dose of lithium along with the Lamictal.

As I have read I see that many of your biochemical reactions (or lack thereof) are similar to my own and so would highly suggest trying this cocktail. All these meds work well together and seem to help stabilize and augment one another.

Another thing you might want to try is diet related. Low B12, Folic Acid and an above-average-need for Omega3 fatty acids (DHA / EFA) are found in bipolar individuals. You might want to consider supplementing your diet with a high quality fish oil soft gels (3,400 mg daily DHA; 6,200 mg EFA) which works out to be 8 soft gels a day) in addition to the other nutrients I listed.

Psych meds put a huge demand on the liver and kidneys and you may want to consider natural (and safe)remedies for optimizing detox and health of these organs.

I too think of quitting my meds often, and realize that the reason why is because they make my body feel poisoned, creating a bipolar-friendly diet and optimizing my brain/liver/kidney function through nutrition has helped me feel 'cleaner' and need to use lower dosages for same effect.

I hope you are able to find a treatment cocktail that works well for you.

Sarah said...

I will be thinking about you.

Emilija said...

I'm so sorry that you are having this reaction to lamictal. I hope you don't need steroids. One drug you might think of as an alternative for lamictal is zonegran. There is a very small open label study which found it to be good for bipolar depression- and didn't cause mania. It is an anticonvulsant that also raises serotonin and dopamine. I take it, I think it is great. Just about the only mood stabilizer I can take with tolerable side effects (except tegretol/trileptal which interfere with my birth control pill). It is off-label, of course. I also think that fish oil is really good. One of my psychiatrists said that he has seen patients who could never get stable over many years get stable when fish oil was added to their regimen. Plus it is good for your heart.