Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Friday, March 30, 2012

One day I'll learn

Everything in bipolar is up and down.  Which is implied by the name.  What is not necessarily so obvious is that it is impossible to predict the things that hurt because of this.

I slept about 3 hours last night and then like yesterday was able to lie/lay/whatever still and just rest for a while.  Far from perfect but something.  I just wish I could get enough sleep that my eyes didn't feel tired.  I know that sounds weird, but tired, burning eyes are just uncomfortable enough to keep me from forgetting that while sleep is good I am still not getting enough.  But I'm still so tired that I'm doing dumb things.  I was sick last night because I thought it was ok to eat yogurt past the experation date.  That would be wrong and was a chance to try my sanitize cycle on my washer.  Ick.  I heated pizza for supper and promptly dumped it on the floor.  Thankfully it was a small sized pizza and so I still had a 2nd half that I was saving.  Or not.

But today's biggest disappointment?  OTs have a national certification that is renewed every 3 years, requring 36 continuing ed credits, and then the states dictate that licensure.  In Ohio I renew that every 2 years.  My next renewal is 2013 for state and national is the 31st, which may be today or tomorrow, I don't really know.  Or the day after?  I haven't done the daily repeated calendar checks today.  Anyway, I've been laboriously getting my credits together and finishing the last few (that was a trip what with no sleep and no comprehension and I will not deny that I filled in a lot of bubbles based on where I knew I should be and probably was because of my years practicing.  I was as honest as I could be, it's just it was too technical.  And not understanding tehnical is why I'm not working.  Over the next year as I try to get my credits for renewal I'll have to both choose easier classes and also ones that I am not expected to master a lot of information.  I probably need to start working on those hours.  Right now I think I have 3 from training at work but 17 is a lot.    And a lot of money.

Anyway, disappointment.  I really struggle right now with reminders all is not well.  And when it asked my practice area and I had to answer not practicing I got a little teary.  But then the next page indicated that because I had a certain number of credits in my practice area (had I had one) that I could have gotten a little stamp or something.  It's meaningless in most ways.  Except that I did earn it, I just don't have a practice area so I had to decline.

Now i have one more thing I meant to do today.  I just don't know what it was.  This is another game I really could live without.

Copyright 2006 www.masterofirony.blogspot.com

1 comment:

Michal Ann said...

Jen, I'm sure this was very difficult and I'm sad for you. I have graduation from my seven month massage school in a week (think I'll make it!) and that's NOTHING compared to all your O.T. schooling. I'll have to gain licensure and keep up with CE's and all that, as well, so I know a little bit of what you're tackling. Sigh.

I have a few extra minutes because all three of the spots for my "free" massages at my externship clinic were scribbled out without anyone giving me a call. I didn't realize it until I wasted time setting up, etc. and scrambling around but I was able to recruit a receptionist for a 75 minutes massage. One LMP would like me to come back at the end of her day but I will probably be scurrying to get my business report on track.

Just checking on you and offering today's "God Calling," the classic devotional written by two ladies many years ago.

Love's Offering

I am your Lord, gracious and loving. Rest in My Love, walk in My ways. Each week is a week of progress, steady progress upward. You may not see it, but I do.

I judge not by outward appearances, I judge the heart, and I see in both your hearts one single desire, to do My Will. The simplest offering by a child brought or done with the one desire to give you pleasure, or to show you love, is it not more loved by you than the offerings of those who love you not?

So, though you may feel that your work has been spoiled and tarnished, I see it only as Love's offering. Courage, My children.

When climbing a steep hill, a man is often more conscious of the weakness of his stumbling feet than of the view, the grandeur, or even of his upward progress.

Persevere, persevere. Love and laugh. Rejoice.

"The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart." - 1 Samuel 16:7

xoxo Michal