Stress

Today I found out my niece won't be afraid of me this time because she can point to "where's Aunt Jen?" in a picture.  Awesome. I feel so, so big.

Sadly I didn't get to share that or the other happy stuff with Dr. Mind like I wanted. I also had some heavy stuff to start.  Instead a work issue that I found out about at 6:45 right before I went in made me so mad that we had a pointless (not really, just not what I wanted) session talking about that and other things frustrating me and making me angry.  Then, just because it wasn't all bad enough and I was leaving feeling mad because work consumed time I wanted for something far different I managed to hit my glass of water rather than picking it up, throwing 32 ozs. plus of water around Dr. Mind's office.  So we spent a good 10 minutes crawling around the floor cleaning up.  For the 2nd time in a couple months as I spilled sprite all over the place another day.  So then I  left fighting tears and with him trying to tell me it was no big deal except it was because it was a last straw.  Then I got home and responding to the work issues maturely took another hour so I'm now trying to get to sleep so at 4 AM I'm wide awake to write notes.  And if they are late I'm going to tell them it is because I spent a couple hours crying due to this ongoing frustrating situation plus trying to deal wtih it and I just didn't make it.  Still goes as a negative on my tracking but whatever.

Tomorrow at least I know I'll be done relatively early since I have a PM meeting that is to be done by 5 or earlier, so I can be sure of being home by 6:30.  That lets me get lots of rest for Saturday, which is haircut and trip to see my niece.  I want to see her once more while she's a baby, not a toddler and since walking is close and she turns one in less than a month it's time.  I bought her some clothes today that were size  24 months and 2T for fall and winter.  She's getting so big.  And so, so, so cute.

And now I need to get to sleep.hopefully sleep comes.  Last night I wound up awake until valium worked about 1:30  AM.   Not good.