I just increased my Seroquel dose again. I'm at the (drugged into occuring) end of 3.5 hours of crying. I had reasons but not 3.5 hours worth. These mood swings scare me; they are so fast. (sorry if put in the wrong word or have typos, I'm getting sleepy from lots of meds).
Will explain more tomorrow.
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Dear Jen,
Reading yesterday's post, where you compared this year to last, made me want to see exactly what you were referring to. Between yesterday and just now, I have read a whole year of your posts.
You are an AMAZING woman. It was a year of down, down, down, and in the midst you pulled yourself up, up, and up again. Just when you were feeling better from all that transpired last fall, you forged ahead once again with the PTSD challenge. What a weak word; "challenge". So much more than that.
You have a lot of guts. I am currently stable and do everything I can to remain that way. I don't rock the boat. And that is why I consider you amazing. I wish I could write what is truly in my heart to be better understood. Just know, I am here praying for you, with you, and am definitely one who is on your side cheering you on.
I wrote you an email before about your neice's name. Thanks for your response - her name is more beautiful than my guess.
"I Am Not OK" also takes a lot of guts to write. I will look later to see if you are feeling any better.
B.
Thank you so much. You have no idea how much i needed to hear that. IT's hard to remember that I have not felt bad forever, and I haven't. I have definitely not had an easy year, but you are correct that I've taken on a lot and the reason I've been able to do that is increased stability.
I'm also impressed you read all that; that's a lot of posts. I have been nothing if not prolific in the last 12 months.
Thank you so much again.
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