So it turns out that today is the day that marks the end of "this is unpleasant" and becomes "this is getting really awful". Today is the first time I have cried totally unprovoked. Today is the first time I have curled up in a ball and laid in bed doing nothing because nothing is interesting in the least. Today is the first day I've really, really wanted to quit this whole thing and learn to live with the severe side effects and not feeling great of the higher dose.
I've been less and less able to read. The last week or so I'd been playing more computer games, cards and yahtzee, but today I'm not able to do that well. I'm getting upset if I lose, even knowing it's just chance. The cards require strategy so I quit even opening the window a couple days ago.
The cooking actually is ok. I like to cook and this is making me feel like I'm accomplishing something. Plus it is so nice to have lots of choices of foods since I'm so limited on what appeals right now. The rest just is feeling pointless. I am so incredibly tired and nothing is interesting. I don't even feel like writing this, but I promised myself at the beginning to write about going through this, even when it started to get ugly.
So, here goes ugly.