Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Saturday, November 14, 2009

The tiniest dot of hope

I feel a tiny bit less depressed today. I think. It's so slight it's hard to tell. The anxiety is still unbearable, but any change is welcome. It may be that I'm having my good hours a little later since I woke up a little later, but that hasn't had any effect on things to date. There hasn't been a day that I can remember that 3 pm was ok. I did manage to plant bulbs for about 30 minutes, and since that's something I enjoy doing that is a big deal. I also made a new soup. Who knows if I'll eat it, but I tried.

I'm starting to get very minor skin reactions. I'm actually currently searching for more places to put into rotation. What's there is very minimal, but it is last. It's just these little red dots that seem to appear where there is a crease in the patch. I'm going to have to use areas I don't like as well (thighs and possibly belly) because it means being more careful about rubbing my clothes against it.

My cat has decided my medic alert tags are fun. I'm wearing 2; one is a dog tag with the most important things on it and to refer to the USB tag for more information. The USB tag let me fill in a whole bunch of specific information which is nice when you have a zillion allergies. The way I have them on now they jingle if they hit and so I now I have a cat pouncing on my chest.

We'll see how I feel later. The day usually gets worse, but so far I'm surviving today.

1 comment:

Michal Ann said...

You're a cat toy! Kitty love!

Is there any chance that body products (lotions, bubbles, etc.) might get lodged under a wrinkle in the patch? I'm glad you're watching carefully. Great self-care! It doesn't always HELP but you make extraordinary efforts to do your part. You're surmounting many of your negative emotions to do what needs to be done. ("DO right to FEEL right.") I admire your diligence and discipline; you're more disciplined than I am, that's for sure!

I hope you feel the Lord with you in the battle. I was encouraged by reading some of Hebrews earlier today. "But Jesus the Son of God is our great High Priest who has gone to heaven itself to help us; therefore let us never stop trusting Him. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, since He had the same temptations we do, though He never once gave way to them and sinned. So let us come boldly to the very throne of God and stay there to receive His mercy and to find grace to help us in our times of need." Hebrews 4: 14-16.

I don't know about you but it's not always easy to come "boldly" and "stay there" at the throne of God. I hope we'll both REST in His mercy and grace. Sit! Stay!

Love, Michal


and I won't mess with your dog tag! (I guess now it's a "cat tag."