Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth." Genesis 9:13

Monday, November 30, 2009

What's going on

In my last post, I alluded to being told no more patch. What really happened is that because I was having some reaction to the adhesive, and then I had the systemic reaction, I'm at higher risk for an overall allergy because I may be sensitized to the stuff now. And that reaction could be much more severe than my rash was. So, until Dr. Brain says it is ok, I can't use it. I may have to be monitored in a hospital to go back on to be sure I don't react, although I would hope this could be done in a regular bed. I don't know what she'll say. She'll be more relaxed about the med overall since she's used it before, but she's as strict as he is about not letting me try Mucinex ever again. The one and only time I took it (the one and only cold med I could take) I got Lamictal rash and since the one could make me allergic to the other I don't get either. Not that this makes me at all bitter or resentful.

Dr. Brain is still out. I have an appointment with her Saturday, but I need to be on the patch before Saturday if I can resume it. Otherwise I need to be in the psych unit about Saturday (keep in mind not only have I had no antidepressant, I have had no psych meds at all except a partial dose of seroquel last night. Tonight I'm taking them). I can't just start another antidepressant; it would be 2 weeks from stopping before anything else could start.

I called her secretary, and her secretary was extremely unpleasant. She refused to just listen to what I was saying, and kept telling me that I needed to contact the doctor who prescribed the med, that it had nothing to do with Dr. Brain, and that Dr. Brain couldn't help me. I couldn't get her to listen that Dr. Brain did not actually write the prescription, but Dr. Brain did put me in the hospital to get put on it, immediately before she got sick, that it is definetely a Dr. Brain med, and that I do not HAVE another doctor who could do anything about it and that the Dr. who put me on it is NOT my doctor, he is the hospital doctor. She finally agreed to put a note to call me ASAP, but noted about 15 times that Dr. Brain won't be back until "sometime this week". I swear she was ENJOYING not telling me specifically when. I pointed out that since Dr. Brain is the only one who can make this decision I just have to wait until she is back, but that when she is this is important. However, I suspect Dr. Brain will not get a message that says what is wrong and will assume it can wait until I see her Saturday.

So Dr. Mind is calling tomorrow for me. Hopefully his "Dr." designation will get actual respect. This happened once before and she treated him sweetly after being mean to me. This woman is a dragon. She has yelled at me for things like calling for a refill I didn't notice I needed several days after an appointment. Yes, I should check and usually do. But Dr. Brain has a list in front of her that says when I need refills too, so it wasn't all my fault. And today she made me so mad I raised my voice, something I never do. I swear she hates psych patients and thinks we're all manipulative. I understand that she's trying to protect the doctor and that this is her job, but there are ways to do that without being mean, and she could simply listen.

Plus, it is not my fault that I was sent home from the hospital without any alternative doctor to call in a situation like this. My family doctor has gone above and beyond, but he can't do what he isn't comfortable with. The hospital was stupid to not do that, and so my plan is that if Dr. Mind doesn't accomplish anything then I will call them and demand that someone do something.

So, now I potentially could be facing an appendectomy AND a psych stay. How lucky am I?

AND, not only that, but I get to collect a sample of a very icky body fluid, one which I had available in abundance an hour before I knew I shouldn't have washed those clothes. (The only good thing is that makes me think appendicitis is less on the table).

On the other hand, I've eaten 2 pieces of toast. And I'm going to go to take my zofran now, and then eat one more with my psych meds. I was given a med to totally neutralize my stomach acid, essentially, and while it was gross (it's a powder form of Nexium and you mix it with a tablespoon of water, let it thicken, drink it, then have to rinse what stuck to the cup out and drink that. I don't know how it tasted, but the let it thicken part is disgusting and it looks like a tablespoon of chicken fat), it really has helped. The hope is that it will let my meds stay in, even though they are a lot more challenging to my stomach than toast or cheerios, the only foods I've had since Friday.

So, I'm very stressed, but it's looking a bit like I might live, hopefully with my appendix intact.


Michal Ann said...

Hey sweet lady,

That's pretty cool if you never raise your voice. I'm not prone to outbursts but it happens. The thing I hate about raising my voice is that it makes some people disqualify me. They can be ridiculous and provocative and then act superior and continue to refuse to listen.

I'm very unhappy with the behavior of the secretary. Please consider relating this news to Dr. Brain. Come on. The secretary doesn't work well with psych. patients and that's her JOB?? Perhaps she needs to be encouraged to get a NEW job (hint hint). Perhaps she needs a crash course in customer service skills. I HATE it when people are rude. I think that rudeness makes the "victim" stupid...being flustered and defensive doesn't do a whole lot to enhance communication.

I'm also shocked that Dr. Brain doesn't have a back-up psychiatrist! I know she had a medical emergency of some sort but are psych patients supposed to take a month off too? It would seem like urgent situations are "normal" for a psychiatrist. Why wasn't there a clearer transition to the hospital physician at a minimum? I mean really, if it's one of the top hospitals in the nation shouldn't this be a normal expectation especially when it's well known that your regular doctor is unavailable? YOU NEED HELP!!

It's kinda odd that a Seroquel ad just played on t.v.~~ it sure makes the point that being bi-polar is extremely difficult.

I know you can't fix all of this now but perhaps it can be part of your ministry when you're back in balance and good health.

BTW, I'm going to search for "Now" brand colostrum on-line or in a health food store. My sister was an elementary school teacher for years and finally learned about this product. It's bovine (cows) but as you may know, colostrum is the first substance mammals recieve before the mother's milk comes in. It provides immune protection to the newborn. Apparently, it's fabulously effective.

I thought that I was in better shape this year due to somewhat lessened emotional pressure but as you know, I've been sick already. I'd better order some colostrum and keep up the other practices that build my immunity. I just used the netti pot, drank a hot drink and took vitamins because my little buddy just dropped by with a runny nose.

Go ahead and pour out all your complaints to the Lord. As a mentor once told me, He is the only one with whom it's safe to be angry. (Psalms provide a great pattern. Pray them!)

Psalm 142: 1-2
I cry out to the LORD with my voice, with my voice to the LORD I make my supplication. I pour out my complaint before Him; I declare before Him my trouble."

Encouraging you to pour out those complaints! ARGHHHH!!

Love, Michal

Emilija said...

If the patch is giving you so much trouble, maybe you can take the medicene orally- even if just for a while. It is just Selegine. The dietary restrictions will be a little more strict, but if it works, I've found them to be a small sacrifice with the MAOI's. Hopefully it would be a quick transition, and no wash-out period needed.